WHY IS VALENTINE'S DAY SUCH A DIFFICULT DAY?

Valentine's day comes around but only once a year. To some, Valentine's day is just another day on the calendar but to others it is the epitome of LOVE and the expression of that love.  All I know is that I receive more and more calls around this time of year dealing with teens with low self-esteem because they do not have a valentine.   I understand it is hard to have high self-esteem when you feel like no one wants to be your Valentine... but you are not alone. I too have gone through the pain and rejection of not having a valentine. 

When I was in grade school I would always love Valentine's Day because everyone would get a valentine's card and candy in their wrapped shoe box from everyone in the class. It was the best of both worlds, I never had to worry about not having a valentine because everyone in my class was my valentine and plus I got a bunch of candy as a bonus.  It was not until middle school that I realized that Valentine's day turned into a popularity contest. Oh how I wished I could go back to valentine's days in grade school yet here I was in middle school with fewer and fewer valentines. However, when I got to high school Valentine's Day really turned into a popularity contest. 

My high school had a candy-gram program, wherein you pay for a piece of candy for your valentine and someone goes into your valentine's classroom and gives your valentine the candy in front of their entire class. I remember that everyone would talk about how many candy-grams they had received yet I had received none. I went through the entire day feeling rejected and low. When I got home I truly felt like bursting into tears. Then I realized something, I was looking at Valentine's Day all the wrong way.  I kept thinking that Valentine's Day was all about me but it was not... it is about the one you love and expressing your love for them. When I stopped making Valentine's all about me and what I was getting out of it, Valentine's became enjoyable and no longer a dreaded day on the calendar. 

Now I am married with a wonderful husband and a beautiful daughter and expressing my love to them is the most important part of Valentine's Day to me. My daughter is in kindergarten and I just finished helping her wrap her first shoebox and all those wonderful memories of grade school valentine's came flooding back. So my advice to you is this, don't get caught up in Valentine's Day popularity but truly make it about expressing the love you have. If you focus on expressing your the love you have for others then, in my opinion, you get the full reward of what Valentine's Day has to offer and avoid some of those low moments on your Valentine's Day.  ​